Now what?

I baffle my self. To claim to be so open minded yet for so long I've shunned away the idea of ever dating a woman. I get in debates and sometimes argue the label of "man" and "woman" yet, "I would never be in a relationship with a FEMALE." I must be a hypocrite.... MUST be. At least to everyone else... or have I even convinced myself that I'm not interested in women beyond a sexual level. AM I interested in women beyond a sexual level?! I don't even know!!! I don't daydream about women like I do about men... unless it involves masturbation of course. These days... i'm curious to find out where I REALLY stand.... with something to back me up. Not just this... notion that females are too emotional for me or... whatever it is that I believe. Ahh... maybe I don't want to admit to it because I don't want to seem to the rest of my family like I'm just "following" in their footsteps. I mean... the fam is gay... i mean.. THE FAM! lol.. like sister.. and like... closest cousins.. they are ALL gay... ALL of them! And although the first time I ate pussy I had to have been like 7 or 8 years old... I'd probably get looked at funny because I've always been so "boy crazy." (Little do they know.. right?) What are you thinking right now? I imagine you are still stuck on the idea of me eating pussy at the tender age of 7...yea? Yea...well.. get over it. She was my neighbor and I dunno... you would think I didn't know what horny was but... fuck it.. I must've liked the smell or taste of pussy... or.. something. Because every time she asked me to come over... I did.. KNOWING what we were about to do. And it didn't stop there.... of course not. I had "have you ever" after "have you ever" experience throughout the next several years of my life. And my answer was always .. "no.. i've never messed with a girl.. have you?" I got off on the shit... and was WAY to ashamed to admit to my sexual experiences before the present time at which shit was abot to go down. Ahh.. and then I went through a period where I thought I was gay and it just broke my heart lol. I'd cry occasionally. Grew up.... realized i'm just a freak... or.. something. That is... at least until now. Is FREAK the correct term? Am I bisexual? Am I confused? Am I just.....? JUST?! *sigh* Lately... I've been getting approached by quite a few girls... and more than ever... I'm curious to take it further than just sex. So do I? And what type of girls do I like? Studs? Femmes? other bisexuals? Like... this is all so new to me yet it isn't new AT ALL. I got this email from a beautiful girl.. I have yet to write her back. I will in the morning. She turned me on... in a major way. Like... she wants to explore me and the feeling is insanely mutual. haha. Aside from her... there's another.... So yea... I'm interested. NOW WHAT?! lol..... we'll see I suppose. I guess I should go to bed. Only so much rambling is appreciated ...yea? lol. Goodnight :)