The Reality of it all is....

I'm another girl behind closed doors and no one knows her but me.
Regularly throughout the week I ask my fingers if they feel me.
They respond "Oooh YES!"...or.. better yet... I do.
Just to look down and see that ...my hands are apart of me too.
Fuck....
I fucked up again.
I figured i had... made a new friend.
and...my worst enemy was what i had yet to begin.
I... CAN....... NOT WIN!
I CAN not not not... win... yet... I am ...IN
and the simple fact that I can't get out
is what makes me bleed for the end.
Scream to begin
because my whispers don't spark enough minds to li-sten.
Listen... here.. I have something to give to you.
My dignity was persistently begging for someone new.
And... since I don't seem to put it to good use
I might as well not waste a good noose
i'm sure my confidence will tighten what's loose.
aaaahh but...
Fight and refuse... pain and abuse.
only you are responsible for the words your lips spew.
vomit spills from my eyes like flu-ridden children
emotion built up entirely on what my heart's reeled in
my mind? well of course it exists....
it's fighting to get over that society fence
peeking over top but legs are stuck in the mix.
i mean... cause I don't care... but i seem to care just a bit.
accepted in a world as cruel as sin and sorrow
at the same time there's always tomorrow...
brighter days and greener grass
sliced the fear you borrowed.
Follow...
no one but yourself and what you think and who you be.
take a piece and add it to create the better 'ME.'
If anything I should be telling this to me.
Well in fact I guess I am because...
...all of you are me.
Funny little fact is this is MY reality..
You are only who I perceive you to be.
At least from where I'm looking..
not quite sure what you can see.
for my soul only reaches the exterior of me.
to view it from your side, your door will never have my key.
You see?
Well... of course you don't.
Or maybe you do because...
...somewhere in me is you.
Interesting enough...
your reality is with you.


-SydniMichael